Monday, August 4

A Down Day & Habbakuk

Today I am having a down day.
For me, days like these are once in a blue moon, but what they lack in frequency I suspect they make up for in intensity, because despite the abundance of blessings in this girl’s poured-out, good-to-the-last-drop life, I can’t see anything but lack on these days.
Lack of love.
Lack of laughter.
Lack of meaning.
Lack of purpose.
Lack of applesauce in the applesauce container, because it somehow ended up in the cottage cheese container…..
And the thing is, no amount of cat posters or inspirational mumbo-jumbo can change my heart on these days. Sure, tried truisms can shift my mental status, but they can’t squelch my sorrow.  My mind may buy into the “It’s not so bad” mentality, but my heart will have none of it. So, instead of wooing my woes away with a cute cat meme, I will acknowledge my bottomed-out-blues and add my name to Habbakuk’s, because in all my lack, He is still my Lord, and if I can be glad in nothing else, I will be joyful in God my Savior.
“Though the fig tree does not bud
   and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
   and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
   and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
   I will be joyful in God my Savior.
The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
   he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
   he enables me to tread on the heights.”

- Habbakuk 3:17-19